Departmental Reports for the week of Oct 2.

"I still got it" dept:
Today on the way back to work from the deli (tabouli salad, fruit and plain yogurt), a man said to me "Hello, Gorgeous!"
OK, he was shirtless, standing in a dumpster and inhaling the contents of an aerosol can, but it still counts.

"TMI" dept:
The hair on my nipples grows faster than the hair on my legs. Both were removed last Thursday, but wow. What a difference a week makes.

"Cereal" dept:
Things are going great in the cereal department. I found moths in the oat bran after eating it for two days. yummy. I took it back to the store today and he gave me my money back, snap snap. He also removed the entire bin for the oat bran and took it to an undisclosed location. I saw the little webs in the bin. If you have ever dealt with bulk grain, you know the webs. They strike terror in your heart. There is no saving anything that has the webs.

"I bought some pants on eBBBBAy and still haven't recieved them" dept:
I received the envelope with the MO inside it that I sent to FL two weeks ago, returned with a sticker that said "No Such Number". Thrilling. I emailed the seller and he gave me the correct address.
HE HAD THE WRONG ADDRESS ON HIS ACCOUNT.
He told me to send the MO to 7469 68th dr. or something of that sort and it was actually 7649 68th dr. (all addys have been changed to protect the silly eBBRay seller).
Then this afternoon he emailed me to tell me he still hadn't received payment. I emailed back, (paraphrased)"yeah, derf, ya gamme the wrong addy" to which he replied "sorry, your [sic] right, long day".
Long day, indeed. Long assed two weeks, if you ask me. I am still considering leaving not so positive feedback. If I get the pants and am totally floored by them, I may not. I'm sure I will say something passive-aggressively snarky in my comment. Sigh. Dealing with stupid buyers all day and then having to deal with a stupid seller who isn't sure of his own addy is tiring. I grow weary.
If he would have let me pay by CC, like he has advertised on his auctions, I would be wearing my sfam a pockets right now. Well, not right now. I'd still be sitting here in my undies and a tshirt right now.
You know what I mean.

"Teeth" dept:
Yup, I got rotten teeth. Such a pretty girl, mm-hmm.
I have been on the lousy antib's which give me terrible stomach pains if i don't eat, even though they say it's ok to take this kind without food. It's a stomach pain that goes from my stomach, into my throat and up through my jaw. All I can do when the pain starts is just sit back and wait. Usually after ten minutes or so it subsides. Today co worker #2 said, after listening to me bitch about how much it hurt for half an hour, "Hey, you know, if you put a piece of tinfoil up in the hole it will stop the pain".
I replied, "yeah and it will jam the transmissions from the alien spacecraft".
I happened to be chatting with Erik at the time and told him about the verbal transaction. He thoughfully suggested that I might be able to pick up AM radio stations, too.
I mean, really! Plus, plus, plus! No pain, no transmissions and some talk radio. I don't see how putting tinfoil in my cavity can be bad.

Before you start telling me how bad it can be, realize that I am kidding.

Thanks.